Help me and Tawn get married

Tawn and I need your help, please.  Just a few minutes of it.

On November 4th, Californians will vote on Proposition 8 which will explicity take away the right of gay men and lesbian women to marry.  Tawn and I, now together for almost nine years, are planning on getting married when we are back in California this December.  We need your help to get the word out to Californians to vote NO on Proposition 8.

No On Prop 8

Outside of the issue of equal rights, this would represent a frightening precedent of the rights of a minority being taken away after they have been won.  This is a disturbing example of Alex de Tocqueville’s “tyranny of the majority”, whereby majority opinion is allowed to trample the civil rights of the minority.

Here’s how you can help me and Tawn:

Contact the people you know in California – let them know about me and Tawn and that if Proposition 8 passes, we’ll be unable to marry in December.  Ask them to vote no on the proposition and to talk with their friends, family and fellow citizens, too.  

If you are a Californian, talk to people who think differently from you – it is easy to “preach to the choir” but the ones who need to hear form you are the undecided voters, the ones for whom a personal story will make all the differentce.  Studies have shown that personalizing the issues makes people more supportive of equal rights.

If you are a registered voter in California, remember to vote – right now the proposition is slightly ahead in voter support.  To defeat it, we will need ever supporter who is registered to vote to actually get out to the polls.  Your vote will count!

Consider contributing to the “No on 8” campaign – They are being outspent by 2-to-1 by donations from outside the state, 30% of which have come from the Mormon Church.  I have already made a donation and hope you will join me.  Even if you donate just $10, you will help buy valuable television airtime so our side of the debate can be heard.  Click here to donate at Equality California’s secure website.

I know that we are ready for the political silly season to be over.  Hang in there and help me and Tawn out for this one last issue!  We’re looking forward to sharing your marriage with you this December, but we can’t do it without your support.  Vote NO on Proposition 8.

Thanks for your help.

292 thoughts on “Help me and Tawn get married

  1. @christao408 – Fortunately, there have only been a few cases of extreme discrimination against gays. I don’t think it’s as bad as all of the crap that African Americans had to put up with–at least there hasn’t been anything like a race riot. That’s NOT to say that everything’s fine and rosy, but count your blessings.I do what I can. It really bothers me that some people believe that their holy book is the Constitution. It didn’t work for the Puritans, it didn’t work under the Taliban, and it’s not going to work for us.

  2. @Blonde_Kayla_luvz_snow – Could you provide a link to a peer reviewed study from a nonbiased source that clearly states that we have looked through ever gene present in the human body and have determined that a “gay gene” does not exist? I don’t think we know enough to say that. Also, who says that everything is either genetic or a choice? Height, for example, is determined partially by genetics and partially by environment. The nutrition you receive when you’re young will play a large role in determining how tall you are.Also, I really don’t think that you’re in a position to argue that homosexuality is a choice when you aren’t gay yourself.

  3. Yeah.. I don’t live in the US but I talked with some of my Cali friends and they’ll vote no~It’s such an awful thing that there’s going to be voting about that…-Marion

  4. if i was old enough to vote i would vote no on proposition8. i personally find this proposition useless and completely pointless. i actually hate this proposition and the commercials about why epoples should vote yes on it. this confuses people and make them think it’s about schools.

  5. @moptoplop – I’ve already stated my oppinion on this but will repost.  California “gays” can enter into civil unions and be allowed all of the pleasures heterosexual couples enjoy to property and decision upon death.  I was saying however that gay men are not allowed to adopt and gay women are subject to fertilization from somewhere, but it has to come from a male… Two opposite sex couples that have damages done to their reproductive organs are still allowed to adopt.  Again I am not opposed to homosexuals, men or women.  Live and be happy, this is America and you have a right to do what you want to do so long as you’re not hurting anyone else.  I also said good luck on this proposition no matter what the outcome.  8)

  6. I’m a Christian and I’ve already planned to vote no on 8. I’m not arguing my points here on Xanga, since this place is mostly populated with baselessly opinionated twelve-year olds, but I just want you to know that there are some Christians who aim to educate themselves and love others in whatever ways we can.

  7. I don’t know anyone in California, but I will check out that link you put up.  I can’t guarentee anything because I am in college, and I am just getting by as it is, but this is a worthy cause so I will see what I can do.  I support you, and I really hope Prop 8 gets voted down!

  8. yay i found your page!! i had stumbled across your page earlier this year and didn’t sub for some reason. Isn’t California supposed to be free loving and all that jazz?? Why can’t people who really love each other get married regardless of what their sex is. I mean women & men get married everyday for the stupidest of reasons. smh!!

  9. I do happen to live in Cali, but i’m a few months too young to be able to vote this year. *facepalm* However, the rest of the family has made sure to vote ‘no’. Best wishes and crossed fingers for you guys [and all others] this November!

  10. @Kephirra – I agree with you completely.  Unfortunately, I don’t think those people will easily change their minds.  Still, I remember that my grandfather went from the “hate the sin, love the sinner” perspective to being present and very supportive when Tawn and I exchange vows in a commitment ceremony with my family.  It took a decade, but change can come to even the most conservative and religious of people.

  11. This is really unfair. Sadly, I don’t reside at CA. But I’ll definitely spread the word around. Well, I do hope you and Tawn get married this Dec! ALL THE BEST CHRIS! (:
    You guys’ve gt our support.

  12. not to ridicule your cause… but if i was an undecided californian voter i wouldn’t be swayed by someone telling me i should vote yes so some couple i’ve never heard of can have their planned wedding in december.

  13. I hope you win your cause and wish I knew even one person in CA to help you out… But hey, if things don’t go your way we could always use more good people up here in Canada   Lots of gay and lesbian marriages up this way!
    Good luck!  I’ll be sending all the good vibes I can down that way

  14. @TheMANinTHEyellowHAT – Thanks for adding your comment.  While you may not be swayed, studies on the issue of gay rights and gay marriage (as well as civil rights and mixed-race marriage) have shown that when people can put a personal face on the story, especially someone they feel they “know”, their views become more moderate. 
    So while I didn’t reach you, I am hopeful that there are many others who maybe changed their vote or, if they were going to vote no on 8, got that extra push they needed to remember to vote.
    Best regards.

  15. @devildidsuzie – Thanks for your support.  Canada certainly would be an appealing place to live in many respects and we know many people up there.  But in the long run, I’m going to fight to take back my country from bigotry and intollerance.  Thanks for the offer, though, and Tawn and I will definitely come up for another visit to the land of the maple leaf.

  16. @TheNumberScott – Thanks for adding your comment.  I hope you’ll reconsider.  Something worth reading in detail to evaluate the arguments for and against gay marriage is the decision of the Supreme Court of California in their May ruling.  Read both the majority and the minority opinion and see what you think after you’ve considered it from the many different legal and social angles:

  17. I was looking through my Footprints Log, and a search engine linked your Prop 8 post to my Prop 8 post. I’m glad it did. I’m glad more people are getting the word out about Prop 8. Honestly, I’m continuously surprised by the plethora of “Yes” voters. When I first saw this proposition on the ballot, I thought it was a fluke. I guess you could say I was naive to think we had gotten to a stage where equality for all really meant equality for all. It’s contradictory when I hear a “Yes” voter say, “Oh well…there’s nothing wrong with them getting married…it just shouldn’t be called marriage.” I am sorely disappointed.I hope you and Tawn have a beautiful wedding this December.

  18. @TygerFairy03 – A futile attempt at justification. Words like “there may be” or “We believe” are hardly persuasive. The article’s conclusion is based on a faulty premise.Here’s an article from the experts, the people who study this for a living 🙂 I’m sorry, but I think these people are more qualified since they’re the scientists who actually make a living by studying homosexuality and not a news reporter who’s payed to write a story. I hope you’ll find some good information on the site 🙂

  19. @Blonde_Kayla_luvz_snow – The study you sent me is completely subjective… done by a group of scientists who are trying to find proof that being gay is not biological, whereas the study I sent you was done by objective scientists. I’m not looking to be persuaded… I’m looking for facts. If a gay man’s brain is more similar to a straight woman’s than a straight mans and a lesbian woman’s brain is more similar to a straight man’s then it seems like pretty solid scientific information that doesn’t need a whole lot of persuasion. Faulty premise? I don’t understand what you’re saying here. I also don’t understand why you believe your scientists are more qualified to write on the topic when the scientists in my article are from an accredited university and are being published in a peer reviewed journal.

  20. @losdesaparecidos – I’m glad you stumbled across this entry, too.  It is amazing that in this day and age – in California particularly – that we’d be debating this idea.  But it goes to show that with enough money to spread a message of hatred and invective, you can drive a wedge into the public.

  21. @Blonde_Kayla_luvz_snow – The National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality?  There’s an unbiased group if ever I saw one.  This must be like the reports showing that studies funded by the food companies dispraportionately “discover” results that are favorable to their funders.  I notice, though, that NARTH doesn’t appear to actually be doing any peer-reviewed, scientifically valid studies.  They are just stringing together out of context quotes in order to justify their pre-held beliefs.

  22. You know a week or so ago I would have said that I was voting yes on prop 8 but my husband and you have been debating the issue thru your blog and now I have to say my mind has changed and now I will be voting no on prop 8. Why? You ask well here goes I tried to put myself in your place and thought how would I feel if someone told me that heterosexuals could not get married. I would be upset that I was not allowed to take my love for that person to the next level. After all isn’t that what marriage really is committing to the person you love. It doesn’t devalue my marriage in anyway because I got married to show how committed and in love with my husband I am. You should be able to do the same. you have my support on prop 8 good luck. 🙂 

  23. @mini_dachshund_lover – That is truly an amazing thing to hear and I appreciate you sharing it.  One of the great things about the internet (it has its downsides, too, of course) is that it allows us to share with each other and learn more about things, places, people, and perspectives we might otherwise not consider.  Thank you for your support.

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